One Month Rheumatologist
Confession: Since I was about eleven years old, I have never gone longer than three months without a doctors appointment.
Confession: I forget what it's like to not have to be see so often.
My record for the longest time without a rheumatology appointment is three months, but that has on
only happened a handful of times. Mostly I go every month or two, depending on my progress. I honestly can't imagine life without frequent hospital visits. And I don't think that's a bad thing either.
When we repeatedly do things that are typically unnatural and cause for alarm, eventually they become nature. A habit even. Whilst others consider going to the hospital quite a lot a bad thing, I began to see it as a good thing: It's an essential part in treatment of arthritis, and treatment is a good thing. I'm not ashamed that I need to be seen so often- my body is different from everyone's and it just requires extra care. And there are people who are seen more often than that, and that's okay too. Taking care of ourselves is a very good thing. Everyone cares for theirselves in different ways. I just wish everyone understood. A lot of the time my family are upset to hear that "yes, I still have to go," and "yes, I'm still taking the medicine," despite adding "but I'm getting better." And after the seven billionth time, the same reaction is quite boring.
But I know it's not so much going that is the bad part. It's after. After hearing bad news. Being sent for yet another test. And worse, not being taken seriously. Sometimes it's not having to go, it's having to deal with the aftermath. Occasionally it's a mix of good and bad that can leave you confused. It's more confusing than your doctor's penmanship.
I used to be terrified of doctors and hospitals, mostly because my mom almost died at a hospital and it was the doctor's fault (long time ago, when I was 10). But now that I have health problems, I have to visit doctors a lot and I'm slowly getting over my fear.
ReplyDeleteIf it weren't for the aftermath, and the doctors who jump to conclusions, I'd probably be totally calm at the doctors( I've been told I have cancer twice and I didn't. I was once rushed to an emergency cardiologist appointment for an EKG and echo because they suspected severe heart problems, ended up being nothing. I was told TB had gone to my bones because of the "scar tissue" in my back x-rays. Ended up being nothing). I dread it though for those reasons.
Oh my gosh! That's horrible! I cannot believe all those things have happened to you- I wouldn't blame you if you never wanted to even look at a doctor again. :(
DeleteI don't, to be honest. But I know I need treatment, so I keep going to the worthless appointments. My family and I are moving back to America though, and the health care is better there (compared to where I live now). So hopefully the doctors will be better :)
DeleteI know many people who travel to America specifically for healthcare, and it must be great if they always return. Best of luck with the move and new healthcare!
Delete