The Girl With Arthritis

Some nights I go to bed and promise myself that in the morning I am going to get up and go out and get things done. But I often break that promise. There are mornings on my days off that I do nothing but lie in bed. It feels very lazy, and sometimes I feel guilty. But it's also very peaceful. I can hear the day starting all around me. I feel my joints gently throb. Pain isn't always something that makes you suffer. In fact, it can be the only thing that lets you know you are alive when the world is cold and numb. From my bed I can look out the window and see the world go by. It doesn't go by without me, though it can feel it. I'm still a part of it, but today I choice to watch peacefully as I rest so later I can join outside. People often call me a homebody. However, this is far from true: I really love to be out and about. There are times I dread coming home, wishing I had time for one last adventure. But it would be no fair to my body to overwork it. I need to rest....

Where have I been? Right here! I've never left, I've just been less active. I haven't participated in social media nearly as much or even written comments on some of my favourite blogs. If you emailed me, I still responded like usual. But I'm not up for communication at the moment. I haven't for a long time. I'm not tired of all the lovely people on and off the internet. In fact, I miss them a lot. I just haven't felt up to writing. I haven't even been texting with my best friends as often. Even to type is tiring and all I want to do is lie down and stare at the screen. But this isn't even bringing my energy back. I force myself to take a long walk at least once a week (but usually more) but it hasn't helped (nor made it worse so I continue to get out for a minute). I really enjoy being out too, I wander through stores and bring home coffee for my mum and I. But afterward, I need to relax and I end up lying down for the rest of the day and so...

To Students Pursuing Medicine (be it nursing, doctoring or otherwise), I think the choice to go into this field is great- you must really have dedication and care for others. That's wonderful, and I say that very lovingly, not sarcastically. I'm even a little envious of you because I fancied the idea of becoming a medical professional when I was younger and still have a medical sweet tooth- I love the reality shows set in hospitals. I know you can do it, and you will be great in what you pursue. But, as a professional patient, I ask for you to learn some things and try others. I want you to try and put yourself in your patient's shoes. Think of how you would react in certain situations- and no, you would probably not be as calm as you imagine. I know it's easier to separate yourself from your patients, but do this at least to understand the way your patient reacts to your words. There are tears, held back sorrow and anger, frustration, guilt, confusion and feeling l...